is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
