Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
