All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
