This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Still dying that you shit outside
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
