i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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