Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
