I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
