I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
