girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize