I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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