Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Randomize
