So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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