He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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