watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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