Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
