oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
