I heard we made out
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
