This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize