By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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