Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Actions speak louder than pants.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize
