He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I deserve this hangover.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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