You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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