I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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