Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize