OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
No subtext here. People are naked.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize