How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We need to rekindle our bromance
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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