dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Randomize
