I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i will never coherently bang her
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
