So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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