You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
