I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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