No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
