I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
