I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
