this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
