im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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