when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
