...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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