the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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