That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
