I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
