Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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