this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
