I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
