every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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