watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
