The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i would punch a child for taco bell
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You dont lie about slip and slides
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
