do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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