yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
