i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
