The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I had to cum in my sink.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
