he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
